I Want to Try Therapy Because I Think I Don't Need Therapy
I can do everything on my own. I don't need to get married. I don't want to depend on anyone for my sustenance.
I thought that people would get married to fill the deep void inside. And it can never be filled by things or a person. Only I, myself, can do that.
That's the kind of thoughts that I harbored in my early and mid-20s. Then a mental illness took me on a roller-coaster ride in my late 20s and then I did a rethink about my life. I realized I would miss certain beautiful experiences of life if I didn't get married (sharing Life).
So, I hesitantly agreed to get married and find a partner who will understand me and not put too many restrictions on me. And I can attest to the fact that getting married was the best decision of my life. Mainly because of the kind of human being I received as a gift from God as my life partner.
Fast forward the story to the present moment when I am in my mid-30s. I have read, heard, and seen that therapy will complement the medication I have been taking since the age of 27 in managing (not treating) my mental illness, which I will disclose openly sometime in the future.
I am the one who is vehemently encouraging my wife and my friends to go for therapy and not be ashamed of it. But for some reason, I was sure that I could do without therapy myself.
All this while I had been writing on the Internet about my mental illness and spiritual encounters and my philosophy of life is an attempt, an outcry in fact to find a like-minded person with whom I can open my heart out. Someone who will listen, like really listen, to the story of my psyche and soul.
And I still think that I don't need therapy. How strange, isn't it? But then six months earlier I decided that enough is enough I was going to find either a life coach or a therapist who can make sense of my inner turmoil and callings from the subconscious.
And here I am, talking to a therapist online about the complexities of life and human nature for six months now. And this time too I feel grateful to existence that I made this decision.
When are you taking the jump?