Angry, Hypocrisy, and Spirituality
I feel like a phony and pretender at times.
I talk about enlightenment and spiritual progress but when it comes to anger and bruised ego I become an out of control elephant.
I can not regulate my emotions and primal instincts and I am talking about becoming a whole being.
The office politics often get the best of me. I try to be nice to and respecting of people but they take advantage sometimes and I end up getting hurt.
So, I try to build up walls and boundaries. And do tit-for-tat. Take revenge.
What an impostor and a hypocrite I am!
But if I treat myself with self-compassion, the story changes.
So what if my emotional brain hijacks the rational one. Can't I read and talk about spiritual mastery? Is mastery over emotional brain a prerequisite to undertake spiritual journey?
No.
It is part of an ongoing process.
What I can do is be more forgiving and less reactive and take a more contemplative action. And be more open and vulnerable even if it hurts.
I read somewhere recently that
Forgiveness is the fragrance that the violet sheds on the heel that crushed it
Isn't it sweet?
That's how I should be!